drivetofive

Odometer (Legend):  529,490

Odometer (ILX):  79,440

Trip Distance:  358 Miles

I’m such a gigantic sucker for tourist traps.

• America’s largest sundial?  Check.
• World’s largest chile pepper?  Yeah.
• World’s largest firecracker?  Saw that too.

How did it take me this many years to succumb to the temptation and check out “THE THING”?  I’m not sure, but I finally took the opportunity to visit a roadside attraction that I’ve passed by dozens of times.  It’s located along the remote reaches of Interstate 10 in southern Arizona, in the desert landscape between Tucson and El Paso.  I took my 2013 Acura ILX for a day-trip on Saturday to see what this place was all about.

Leaving the Tucson area eastbound, motorists are assaulted right away by bright yellow billboards in rapid succession, advertising this so-called “Mystery of the Desert.”  It’s enough to make you wonder, “What in the heck is it?”  And that’s exactly what the entrepreneurs who run “The Thing” want you to do!  By the time I arrived at Exit 222 for Johnson Road about 40 miles later, I had counted upwards of 15-20 billboards with various messages luring me in.

You really can’t miss this place.  Just when you start zoning out as the interstate makes its way through some rocky outcroppings, your eye is caught by the giant yellow structure.  There might as well have been a fishing line reeling my ILX into the parking lot because I had taken the bait big time.  I plunked down $1 cash and told the cashier, “One adult admission please.”  The man pointed to a door against the back wall and said, “Go through the door.  Follow the yellow footprints.  The Thing is in the third building.”  And off I went toward the entrance.

I thought that the entrance door would lead me into a dark, enclosed room of some sort.  My eyes were blinded when it instead opened up to the outside.  The adventure just kept getting weirder.  Yes, there were yellow painted footprints on the sidewalk ahead of me, so I followed the cashier’s instructions to see where they’d take me.  It felt like some sort of treasure hunt.  Each of the 3 buildings was a giant warehouse of sorts with artifacts on display.  The first had a couple of antique cars (1932 Buick and a 1937 Rolls-Royce), each covered up in a thick layer of dust.

I picked up my walking speed a little bit.  “What is this stuff?  Take me to The Thing already!” I thought to myself.  I paused just momentarily to check out a few other things.  Mannequins, an old phonograph, various vintage pieces of furniture, guns, and Indian artifacts.  Cool, but I wanted to see The Thing.  Continuing on I went:  Building 1, then outside, then Building 2, then outside, then, I entered Building 3 at last.  A colorful banner told me that I’d arrived.  I felt like Clark Griswold when he finally spotted the perfect family Christmas tree.

There it was.

“It’s A Wonder!”

Yes, indeed.  So, there was The Thing in all its glory, enclosed in a cinderblock vault with a plexiglass cover over the top.  So, what was it?  I think I’m going to be a tease and let the secret remain.  Hahaha!

I grabbed a mushroom Swiss hamburger at the Dairy Queen attached to the gift shop before heading back toward Phoenix.  It felt great to finally know what The Thing was.  Here are the rest of my pics from the trip!

Pit stop in Benson, Arizona near Tombstone

Sandstone rock formation on I-10

Exiting at Johnson Road where The Thing is located

From the outside, the warehouses at The Thing are painted vivid colors.

I followed the dirt road around toward the Big Rig parking because I wanted the full experience.

Hype?  Yeah, lots of it.

In we go.

Souvenirs galore.  Yes, this place is a definite tourist trap.

Here are those yellow footsteps.

Building #1

The 1937 Rolls.  Sign reads:  “This antique car was believed to have been used by Adolf Hitler.  The Thing is, though, it can’t be proved.”  Clever.

More footsteps leading to the next building.

This one felt like a museum.

Edison phonograph.  “Plays Cylindrical Records,” the sign said.

What the heck?  A bedroom set in this building.

Post-tour lunch @ DQ.

And back to Phoenix I went!  Drive time was about 2.5 hours each way.

Thanks for joining!

This entry was posted on May 19, 2014 at 5:25 am and is filed under Arizona, ILX, Road Trip. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.